10 reasons to keep smoking...HUMOR

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Last post made 15 years ago by Imagin.ation
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PMM2008
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  • PMM2008
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  • Hi Gang:
        As many of you know I am a smoker. I was unsuccessful at my last attempt to quit. I do this posts as I try to find the humor in everything.  I know we have many smokers here on the forum and I thought this might get a laugh.



    10. That lighter comes in handy for birthday candles.

    9. Your ex-spouse wanted you to quit and you won't give him/her the satisfaction.

    8. The occasional holes in your clothes give you a needed excuse to shop

    7. Philip Morris needs that money more than you do.

    6. Those extra wrinkles give you that "mature" look.

    5. The smell on your coat makes it easy to pick it out of a pile at a party.

    4. If not for the smoking you'd be perfect, and nobody likes a perfect person.

    3. If your sense of smell came back you'd have to do something about that litter box.

    2. You wouldn't get any exercise at all if you didn't run outside the building every hour for a cigarette.

    1. That rattle when you breathe reassures you that you're still alive.


                                                            PMM2008
  • LMAO!!!!! My #1 reason--
    The occasional holes in your clothes give you a needed excuse to shop


    GREAT POST PAMMY!!!!
  • The holes in your clothes........that has to be my favorite one!!! Get enough holes and we can connect the dots!!!

    Lips


  • My daughters father was a smoker, smoker ,smoker.. he would sleep
    smoking, so many times i had to take the burning butt from his hand,
    he would lay his hand on his chest with the cigarette incase he fell asleep
    it would fall on his chest burn him and wake him up, i used to get so mad.

    Cigarette burns everywhere, couch, carpet, clothes, coffee table, even burns through the ashtrays!

    One day i walked into the bedroom, and he was sitting there with this :-\ <--look
    on his face, kind of like that, right away i was saying.. what did you do?
    He says.. nothing.. umm.. whats for dinner? I just looked a moment, walked to the kitchen
    he finally came out of the room, still with this  :-\ on his face..

    I put down the kitchen utensils and was determined to find out what the heck
    that look on his face was for, walked to the bedroom, looked around.. hmm
    nothing.. went to fix the bed where he had taken a nap..i find a 3 inch burn
    hole in my 600.00 comforter, not only that but the burn had gone through
    the sheets, padding.. and into the mattress....

    I never again wanted to find out what that look is on his face anymore
    i just trusted it as, "you don't want to know" kind of look

    Btw, when i walked back into the kitchen.. all the utensils where hidden LMAO

  • I don't know why I laugh at burning holes in my own clothes.
          I really don't burn up to much. The brand I smoke doesn't fall apart to bad but when I have smoked cheaper cigarettes, I have had the problem of falling ashes on my clothes.
            As far as falling asleep smoking? Never . That is  serious business there. No joking matter.
           Imagin.ation? You must of had alot of patience to not  clobbering your daughters father for his smoking habits.

  • Yes exactly no joking matter, it was horrifying the thought of
    what could of happened..

    Not to be grimm, but he did pass away of lung cancer, very young age
    He smoked 3 to 4 packs a day, he was diagnosed, told he had 6 months
    He refused treatment, he passed away 4 months after diagnosis..

    He was 47 years old, scares me.. i am 33 and a smoker, not nearly that much


  •   Oh that is such a wakeup call for me.  I read your posts and got goose bumps.
    I need to quit this terrible habit, but I just am at a loss.  To be free again, with a life without that ball and chain of smoking? It sounds like heaven to me.  Yet here I sit, smoking away.  **sigh**

  • Pam, ten years prior to this he did have a lung x-ray, the x-ray was taken because he for some reason on a TB test on the skin, it bubbled slightly
    He never had TB in his life, nor did he have it then, yearly he took
    TB tests because of his job, in the x ray the doctor saw a mass, which was misdiagnosed for a "scarring of TB"...the doctor told him
    at some time in his life he contracted it, it was then he had it.
    and at that point should of been more closely examined.. his life
    would of been saved

  • Imagin.ation
        That is an all to common story. I am so sorry for you and your loss. Ecspecially for your daughter to not have her father.  Life can be hard to understand, why things happen to people the way they do.  :-\
                  Thank you for sharing that story with me. 
               
           

  • Darn it DARN IIITTTTTT

    I just lit my last cigarette on the wrong end... OMG
    It tastes so naaassstttyyyy.. GAH!  :'(

    Now i got to get dressed and goto the smoke shop..

    I'll tell you another that makes you wanna quit..
    How about dropping a brand new pack into the toilet..?


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