Difference tween Men and Women ATM Withdrawals

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Last post made 14 years ago by Shelli
Lipstick
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  • Lipstick
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  • ATM

    A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

    "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

    After months of careful research, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed.

    Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender:

    MALE PROCEDURE

    1. Drive up to the cash machine.
    2. Put down your car window.
    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
    4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
    6. Put window up.
    7. Drive off.

    FEMALE PROCEDURE

    1. Drive up to cash machine.
    2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
    3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
    4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
    5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
    8. Insert card.
    9. Re-insert card the right way.
    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
    11. Enter PIN.
    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
    13. Enter amount of cash required.
    14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
    16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
    17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
    18. Re-check makeup.
    19. Drive forward 2 feet.
    20. Reverse back to cash machine.
    21. Retrieve card.
    22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
    23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
    24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
    25. Redial person on cell phone.
    26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
    27. Release Parking Brake.

    he he he

    Lips
  • Toooo funnnneeeee! I do the same thing all the time-lol!


  • ATM

    A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

    "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

    After months of careful research, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed.

    Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender:

    MALE PROCEDURE

    1. Drive up to the cash machine.
    2. Put down your car window.
    3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
    4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
    5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
    6. Put window up.
    7. Drive off.

    FEMALE PROCEDURE

    1. Drive up to cash machine.
    2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
    3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
    4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
    5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
    6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
    7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
    8. Insert card.
    9. Re-insert card the right way.
    10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
    11. Enter PIN.
    12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
    13. Enter amount of cash required.
    14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
    15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
    16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
    17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
    18. Re-check makeup.
    19. Drive forward 2 feet.
    20. Reverse back to cash machine.
    21. Retrieve card.
    22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
    23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
    24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
    25. Redial person on cell phone.
    26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
    27. Release Parking Brake.

    he he he

    Lips



    OMG!!!!!!!  This is the funniest thing I ever read!!  Lips, is this you??

    You know, they should really make these into large boards, and post them at the drive thru and have male and female drive-thrus...it would probably move along much quicker!!

    Too funny!!

      Nal  cool
  • LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Too funny!

  • What a sexist post!

    LOL....and true as the Gospel! haha!

  • but soooooooooo funny  grin grin grin

  • LOL.............................................................LOL................................That was my mother!!!...OMG!!! tongue tongue tongue

  • hehehehehe....its NOT me...but i have seen so many of them.  grin grin grin

    way funny!!!  still laughing  grin

  •   have you been talking to my girlfriend before-after-during going to atm?

  • I have to admit to at least half was true for me!!! Another thing i do is pull out the card so i am ready to go when i get to the atm and then can't find the card!!!

    It ends up buried at the bottom of my purse as i absently mindedly toss it! Or i suddenly have draw a blank and can't remember the pin number....the same number i have had for agessssss!!

    Not to mention the kind of ATM's that suck your card up and spit out when transaction is complete. This is really sad..... I was in the car at the ATM with my sis and said...."OH i don't like these kind of sucky up your card ATM's..cuz i am afraid i will leave it and drive off"

    No sooner did i drive away and yessssssssss left my card!!! And i just talked about it!! Now that is pathetic. I knew what i did the second i drove off. No one was behind me and i reversed back to the ATM. It was not in the slot.

    So now i think i'm losing my mind and ransack my purse, the car, my lap, the ground!! No where....i later found out that if you don't take your card in a certain time frame the machine will suck it right back up for security reasons.

    It's the simple things in life i struggle with!!!

    Lips

  • i KNEW it was you!!! hahahahaha!!!

    hey don't feel bad, last week when i went...i put my card in...do the transaction,
    take out 250. to take my friends out for lunch...it says take your cash
    waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting...i'm like wtf... :'( :'( :'(

    then it finally says transaction cannot be performed...but IT ALREADY HAD, because it said TAKE YOUR CASH.  then it doesn't give me a receipt!!  ???

    not funny...i drive to the next one down the road, it says...you have reached your daily withdrawal limit!!!!  now i am really pissed.  they didn't give me my money, and i am supposed to take everyone out to lunch with maybe a buck and change...

    called my bank, they said oh, you need to call the bank it was done at...called them, they said...oh, we cannot access your account...you need to call your own bank.

    back and forth bull for over a week and a half!!!

    i finally got my money, and my peeps take ME out to lunch, because my contract is ending,  so it worked out good, except everyone is going to miss everyone, and it sucks, but maybe i can go back in the spring.   grin

  • OH NO!!!! 

    Thank god that has never happened to me!  Cuz if it had I woulda never met any of you and I would be sitting in prison for murder!!!!!!!

    I am so sorry that happened to you hun.

  • thanks shell.  i was upset that day.  a little embarassed.  get to work, always a story with me  grin  i'm like hey guys we can go to lunch, but you have to front me the money
    grin grin grin  blah, blah blah...they were upset for me too.
    eventually, my bank was very nice and worked with me, but it took some time because i did not have a receipt.

    glad it wasn't my last penny like usually when something like this happens  cool

  • Yea, I am SURE if it happened to me it would be my last penny!! 

    So glad it all worked out!

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