Sayings That Just Make No Sense

What about words/sayings that make absolutely no sense? Here's two that have always gotten me:

Parkway/Driveway.....totally contradictive. You DRIVE on the Parkway, and PARK in the driveway! 

Comeon folks...throw some more out there!

No, they actually make complete sense.
You drive along the parkway, because park in this case is the noun...a park, a scenic area, NOT the verb to park.
You park in the driveway, because when the term came into being, driveways were quite long, perhaps a mile long and did require driving along them to arrive at the home, and only recently have they become short little things leading into a home, hence being able to park in them...you did once DRIVE in the driveway

The one I don't like is Forgive and Forget! Uh no, I will always forgive, but I will never forget!

We don't forget the good things that happen to us so why on earth would we forget the bad, what set my self up to have it happen again It sounds good, but it is not a good idea. Furthermore, I don't think we could forget something negative that affected us if we really wanted to!

Forgive and Store Away, but never dwell!

Can someone please explain this saying:

"That's when the s**t hit the fan"!!!!

Now this makes no sense to me at all......yet i say it often.......lmaooo!!

Lips

How about.. "Open a can of Worms"....

There's one i had backwards forever..and forever no one corrected me, they just looked at me weird.. but it did the trick.. til finally my daughters father told me the actually saying..
I would just quickly say.. "Don't get a bunch in your panties".. but it was actually "Don't get your panties in a bunch"

"knock on d" I use it many times but it makes no sense...surely, knocking your knuckles on a piece of d won't  avoid any bad luck...will it?

I don't know wnanhee...........but i sure do look for d!!!!! Sometimes it may take me a few minutes to find it.

I was in my car once and said something and could not find d anywhere!! Ck'd the glove box and found a pencil to knock on........lmaooo!!

Lips

....well if the s**t did hit the fan it would go all over the place so I guess it means everyone's in the s**t.

I have a couple of sayings my sweet little Nan (grandmother) used to say.

If something shocked her she would say "I haven't seen such a thing since little Mary died" and if she was surprised about something she would say "Ooh mother look at Dick, he's sitting on the hearth rug playing with his pinafore".

These I am certain were passed down from her mother.  She had loads of them and they were all strange but funny.  

The other one that used to make me giggle was if her hand went weak or she had pins and needles in it she would say "My hand has gone all laughy".  Still makes me chuckle even though she is no longer around.

blue

"I am from the government, and I am here to help you."

LMAO!

Actually, I was referring to the Garden State (NJ) Parkway. The Garden State Parkway (GSP) is a 172.4-mile (277-km) limited-access toll parkway that stretches the length of New Jersey from the New York state line at Montvale, New Jersey, to Cape May at the southern tip of the state. Its name refers to the state nickname, the "Garden State." Most New Jersey residents refer to it as simply the Parkway. The Parkway's official (unsigned) designation is Route 444. The highway connects to a short segment of the New York State Thruway known as the Parkway Extension, which is officially designated as New York State Route 982L, an unsigned reference route. That 2.4 mile segment connects to the Thruway mainline. The Parkway has been ranked as the busiest toll highway in the country based on number of toll transactions.
It's not actually a road alongside a park (noun). That's why it makes no sense to me, or anyone else from NJ. It should be called a 'tollway' since all along the Parkway, you have to pay tolls.

Does the cat got your tongue?
That one baffles the heck out of me.

Tyesmom,
That's a good one! I never got it either.

:-\

ok....here's one that is a constant disagreement between myself, and others I meet that live south.

Do you "Call into work" __or___ "Call out of work" ??

Where I grew up, it was always known to  "Call out of work". You are literally, calling OUT of work.
But when I moved to TX then VA, they say "Call in to work"

To me, that doesn't make sense.

A penny saved is a penny earned....

To me a penny saved is......NOT MUCH.

haha...PMMM. You crack me up!
Oh! What about "pretty ugly" ?

How are packages on a ship called "cargo" when packages on a car are called "shipments"?


oh and what a little smart a** on the first reply to this post....don't worry though, I'm pretty sure the rest of here understood the point of this topic...!   

Satan,
You've got me laughing so hard right now my stomach hurts and I think I just peed a little!

Here's a few more just for giggles..! [and we don't need explainations for these as they are...well...just for giggles]


Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips ?  

If Alcoholics Anonymous is anonymous, why do the meetings start with “Hi my name is ______, and I’m an alcoholic”?

Why are they called apartments when they’re together?

If #2 pencils are the most popular, why are they still number two?

Why is it that a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

Why do dogs get upset when you blow in their face but stick their head out the window when riding in a car?

Why do you have to work like a slave to get a masters degree?

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"?

How does skating on thin ice get you into hot water?

When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?