Some top things NOT to say during sex!

1.  Whoa...what is that smell?
2.  Ummm, what is your name again?
3.  But, everyone looks funny naked!
4.  Opps, did I not mention the video camera?
5.  Oh no!  I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs!
6.  Wow...you're good enough to do this for a living!
7.  You know, you look a lot like my mother.
8.  You look younger than you feel.
9.  No, no, no!  I do this part better by myself!
10.  Don't worry, those are not cracker crumbs, its just my rash.
11.  I think hard biting is romantic, don't you?
12.  I want a baby.
13.  Is it in, yet?
14.  He-he-he, my last boyfriend was bigger than you!
15.  Let me get behind you so I have a place to put my ash-tray.

16. They weren't this gentle in prison
17. I shave for aesthetics. That bug thing is TOTALLY a rumor, I swear!
18. Gosh, the guys at school will never believe this
19. twoot! Here comes the train, chugga chugga chugga
20. Hullo, ullo, llo, lo, o

Lmao... LMAO.. Thank you doc, i really needed a list. We might need some come back lines as well, so it's good to be prepared, just in case. I'd just die if one of those lines ever got said to me.

I love the crackers crumbs/rash line!!! Great list doc and dtweet! Certainly would diminish a mans er uh em.........ego.......lmao!!

Lips

LMAO - I love em all but that number 20 got me laughing out loud.

Thank you both for such a good laugh.

blue

How about this one that my friend said to her husband;
He was on top and she said " Honey, I gotta turn away, I can't look at your boobs, they're disgusting ehhhw!"

One Words-Limpbiscuit!!!!

I don't get number 20.

Olga

LMAO Chilly... he is whispering in her ear.. 

LMAO LMAO... ahahahahaaaaa

LMAO.  

seriously...I still don't get it!

It's an echo.....you know, like when you shout up an alleyway!   

blue

Aaahhhahahha.. im laughing so hard OMGGGGGG

It took every ounce of will power not to mention the word sausage!

LMAO

blue

he's whispering in her "other" ear .. the vastness is causing an echo..lmaooo, checkin for deepness, might be needing mountain climbing gear, a rope at least.. in case he falls in

lmaoo @ shoutin up an alleyway.. LMAOOOOOOOO ahahahahaaa

21. Is it ok if I call someone, its ok though, keep going....
22. Get off me, I'll do it myself!
23. Should I ask why you're bleeding?
24. Oh you wanted me to use a condom? I'm all out, can I use a sock?
25. I think I just sh^t on your bed.
26. Stop moaning, you sound so stupid.
27. It’s ok, it’ll be better next time.
28. I actually don’t mind you sweating profusely all over me
29. Aww, it’s so cute!!
30. Haven't you ever done this before?
31. I knew you wore a padded bra!!

LMAOO @ awww it's so cute!!!!!

ROFLMAOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

lmao..we used to say 'oo, she so loose, ya gotta strap a 2X4 to your @$$'
snicker

thanks for the help.  got it now.  shoulda been "ricola!...cola...ola...ahhhhh" and i would coulda got it the first time!

is anything on you real? (fake breasts,fake hair,fake lashes,fake butt)hee heee heeeeeee

I still dont' get #20.  :-\ 

I am OLOLOL at 'I do this part better myself.'

This needs a dang warning sign iccon      


I think I just ruined my chair (warn people " It is advised to empty weak bladders PRIOR to reading"  not to mention I couldve seriously injured myself laughing so hard.......ALLEYWAY???????????????????????????

oh oh oh              wow

heheherhe
ummmm


my ummm  2 cents.....Grand Canyon    big "hole" in the ground that if you yell across it echos

LOLOLOL

             ROFLMAOOOOOOOOOO

  Duh!!! 



Thank you, lady!  I just got it 

You would think am living under a rock.

or

in a cave......

or

in a black hole.....

black hole........snicker (zips lips)

32. wrong hole thats my belly buttom.
33. ur like a door knob. everybody had a turn.

ROFLMAOOOOOOOOOO you guys are killing me!!!!

Her: Oo, you're the biggest...you're the best...you're the first!!!
Him: How do you know I'm bigger and better if I'm the first?

i was so excited when you took me up on the sex offer, I had no idea you were into trannys..............

I had 2 REALLY think about on whether or not posting this 1 would be crossing the line, but here is goes:

Get off of me dad, you're smashing my smokes!!!

oh luvkitty, u naughty naughty girl, when r u cuming out to California? I'll be here with open arms, and plenty of smokes.

let's remember, get in, get out, (not to fast this time), nobody gets hurt