Your No Good Heartbreaker....Your a Liar and a Cheat

As far as I am aware I have never been cheated on, BUT I have walked out on 3/4 year long relationships for alot less...Every time a child was involved and it left me in an undesirable financial situation, but if I'm not happy with  a person and don't want to be there than NOTHING is gonna make me stick around.....For those who do I don't really know what to say without sounding harsh.........I think it's just desperation, low self esteem, fear of starting over and in some cases maybe they forgive because they haven't been faithful themselves..........sorry to sound so mean, but what other reason does one have to tolerate being treated like shit?? And the whole staying together for the kids is THE WORST thing I think anyone could do. Your children are then stuck in an unhappy household where mommy and daddy always fight, no family outings, just a sad experiance for a child altogether...besides what kind of messege does that send out to a child, that it's OK to be unhappy and that when they grow up and are in a bad relationship themselves that there is no other way for them to make it without that person, or that it should be tolerated for whatever reasons....Sorry, but I want my daughter to KNOW, that if something is not right, I don't care who's involved or what she has to leave behind there is always was way to make it without making yourself miserable!!

Oh that has got to be the worst blow to anyone's self esteem is to be cheated on.  Ecspecially when it comes out of nowhere and you had no clue it was happening.

    My sister found love letters in her (ex) husbands tool box as he had been having an affair with a woman at work for sometime.  It was devistating. Two small children at home still in diapers.  She stayed with him, but it was a short time before the rest of the marriage fell apart. See, he was truely not sorry.  Continued in his cocky ways, and actually made my sister feel like it was her fault.
      I believe a relationship can survive with an infidelity but it takes a serious commitment from BOTH parties to figure out what went wrong, and possibly why it happened.  I think therpy is a must.  However there will always be those situations where no amount of help is going to save it, and it is better to let it go, then to try to save a sinking ship.  Only one can decide when they are in that situation after much soul searching.
                                                                  PMM

When I used to do family counseling, I worked with lots of couple where there was the pain of cheating.  Most couples ended up spliting, but a good number worked it out, and many of THOSE actually had an improvement in their marriage. 

Now, I have to agree with Satans.  Staying together "for the kids no matter what" is not always advisable.  Yeah, I think kids should have two GOOD parents in the same house.  But.....life does not always turn out that way.  If the situation is highly toxic, then that over used saying does not apply.